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So you want to eat a little bit better, but refuse to subsist entirely on sad salads and depressing handfuls of mixed nuts? Good news: You can have the best of both worlds — that is, good health and good food — so long as you mind...
We’ve all boarded a plane optimistically, laptop in hand, determined to Get Lots Done. “When I disembark,” we think, “I’ll have written that novel / solved that problem / perfected that plan. It’s an office in the sky, and I’m a 21st-century, world-travelling badass, a jet-set go-getter.”...
February 20, 2020
Ah, to be a kid again: No worrying about things like taxes, or wrinkles, or whether you’ll have enough money to make rent (Owning a house? Please.) AND buy yourself dinner. Oh, and the other great thing about childhood? A mouth that doesn’t stink like a sewer....
I’ve never been to a crime scene, but on the morning after I finally got over the flu that kept me in the fetal position for nearly four days, my apartment looked like the sort of environment that requires a hazmat suit. There were crinkled up napkins...
Got stuck? No problem. Here are the answers to this month’s puzzles: ROMPECABEZA UNO: 1. Divot 2. Adult 3. Risky 4. Taboo 5. Spurn Mystery keyword: DARTS ROMPECABEZA DOS:
February 19, 2020
There are a number of worthwhile tasks a ruler is very good at: To measure the length of a thing, specifically, a thing that is probably under a foot in length; for drawing straight lines; and for marking specific points on said straight lines, often in aid...
Organ donations are important, I know, but, uh, can someone donate a testicle? And if so, where would they donate it to, and what the hell for? “No,” says urologist and sexual health doctor Joshua Gonzalez, emphatically. “They don’t even do testicular transplants — that’s not a thing....
February 18, 2020
You are what you eat, as they say, which means, if you smell like a gallon of milk that spent two weeks sunbathing on the dashboard of a car parked in Death Valley, hey, you might be able to blame that random gallon of milk you found...
One of the hardest things I’ve had to do (and continue to do) in my 35 years on this mortal plane has been kicking nicotine. From the day my college girlfriend broke up with me when I was 20 until only a couple of years ago, I...
February 14, 2020
Ah, Valentine’s Day — that holiday dedicated to love, appreciation and panicking while trying to find your partner a gift that symbolized the entirety of your relationships so they still love you come February 15th. Seriously, though, I have, like, no money and need to come up...
It Could Happen To You: You’re at some nice hotel you wouldn’t ordinarily drop the cash for, and in order to fully milk the experience, you know you’ve gotta be fully nude, in bed, with a tray of chicken tenders. You don’t want to stank up the...
February 13, 2020
For thousands of years, the heart — and these days more often, the heart emoji — has been THE stand-in for love, and the symbol through which millions of lovers express their feelings to their significant others on Valentine’s Day (and most other days, for that matter)....