I’ve never been to a crime scene, but on the morning after I finally got over the flu that kept me in the fetal position for nearly four days, my apartment looked like the sort of environment that requires a hazmat suit. There were crinkled up napkins...
Got stuck? No problem. Here are the answers to this month’s puzzles: ROMPECABEZA UNO: 1. Divot 2. Adult 3. Risky 4. Taboo 5. Spurn Mystery keyword: DARTS ROMPECABEZA DOS:
Organ donations are important, I know, but, uh, can someone donate a testicle? And if so, where would they donate it to, and what the hell for? “No,” says urologist and sexual health doctor Joshua Gonzalez, emphatically. “They don’t even do testicular transplants — that’s not a thing....
One of the hardest things I’ve had to do (and continue to do) in my 35 years on this mortal plane has been kicking nicotine. From the day my college girlfriend broke up with me when I was 20 until only a couple of years ago, I...
Ah, Valentine’s Day — that holiday dedicated to love, appreciation and panicking while trying to find your partner a gift that symbolized the entirety of your relationships so they still love you come February 15th. Seriously, though, I have, like, no money and need to come up...
It Could Happen To You: You’re at some nice hotel you wouldn’t ordinarily drop the cash for, and in order to fully milk the experience, you know you’ve gotta be fully nude, in bed, with a tray of chicken tenders. You don’t want to stank up the...
For thousands of years, the heart — and these days more often, the heart emoji — has been THE stand-in for love, and the symbol through which millions of lovers express their feelings to their significant others on Valentine’s Day (and most other days, for that matter)....
There are only four skywriters in the entire world, so if you want to send a message from heaven on Valentine’s Day, you’ll need to get on that soon. Maybe you’ve already determined that insanely expensive prix fixe menus, padded cards and a tennis bracelet won’t do...
I regularly struggle to make simple decisions regarding what I’d like to eat for dinner — yes, I’m that girlfriend trope. Nevertheless, I know that when it comes to making more significant decisions — whether to accept a job offer, break up with someone, move across the country — an empty...
Few things are more frustrating than looking forward to a warm, relaxing shower after a long day, and instead having to endure an oscillating stream of scalding and glacial water because something to do with the temperature is all messed up. But before you go tearing your...
I am neither a poet nor a scientist, and so to describe what sex smells like seems near impossible. Sex smells like… body juice? Erotic-flavored sweat? Chicken broth? According to expert sex doctors and fellow sex-havers, all of the above. But there are a handful of components...
There’s a big difference between having breath that smells like alcohol and having alcohol breath: The former simply acknowledges that one’s breath smells as though they’ve consumed alcohol, while the latter is that wretched scent of yeast, sugar, nastiness and the sort of moldering despair you can smell...
