About a week ago, as I went to feed my 10-year-old pet turtle Grover a bunch of dried turtle pellets, I looked deep into his eyes and wondered: “Does he even know who I am?” “Does he trust me?” Or even, dare I ask, “Does he love...
Odds are, it was just a fit of blind fury when you told your partner that you only married them for their money. But in the moment, you were angry: The world was on fire, and awful things somehow escaped from your mouth. Because if there’s one...
Humans evolved to stand upright and outrun their predators, so it’s no wonder sitting sedentary in a halogen-lit office is ruining the species. But it’s not just your lower back and general outlook on life slowly being crippled by your 9-to-5. It’s also your butt. Hemorrhoids. Irritation....
Unfortunately, there are no puberty-adjacent symptoms that correspond with getting your life together. You don’t start growing hair under your arms when it’s time to quit trying to make it as an actor, and you probably don’t start throwing temper tantrums at your parents when it’s time to buy...
A modern truism: America’s lengthy history of hating on shorts has bred whole generations of inexperienced male shorts-wearers. This unfamiliarity with bare-legged style has led to many a heinous outfit, such as the classic “dad on vacation” look of jean shorts, knee-high socks and sandals. The good...
According to stereotypes, mechanics exist to prey on those of us not mechanically inclined, try to scare the heck out of us, sell us parts and fluids and fixes we don’t need, and screw with us about how much it’ll cost and how much longer they’ll need...
Night sweaters can be divided into three categories: Men, women and children. “The reasons why people sweat at night is quite gendered,” says Rafael Reisfeld, a surgeon at the Center For Hyperhidrosis. But hold up: First, what the heck are night sweats anyway? According to the Mayo...
With temperatures regularly topping 100 degrees these days, there’s no noise quite as pleasing as the hum of an air conditioning system. But like all things that seem pure and good, there’s always a catch — and in the case of air conditioning, that catch can be death. Well,...
When you’re a dad, parenting questions often come up that you struggle to find an answer to. Since other parents are the worst and Google will send you down a rabbit hole of paralyzing, paranoid terror, we’re here to help by putting those questions to the experts....
According to a recent report published by the Centers for Disease Control, federal guidelines recommend that we log at least 150 minutes of exercise per week. However, just 23 percent of U.S. adults are consistently meeting the guidelines. In the voice of Mr. Strickland in Back to...
You may have been told by some desperate parent, in an effort to make you eat your cruciferous vegetables, that broccoli is “the toothbrush of the colon.” In our ongoing efforts to answer every dumb question we’ve ever had, we checked in with our favorite food expert,...
“Death by memo”: It’s a complaint often heard in the workplace, when great ideas get stomped into dust by numbing protocols and procedure. But for all its reputation as the last word in banal bureaucratic buzz-kill, the internal memorandum has often, in its history, carried actual life-or-death...
