“That’s great work you’re doing there. It really is the most neatly arranged stack of loaves of bread I’ve seen in a long while…” These words have all taken a running cliff-dive out of my mouth, and now I can never get them to go back in....
Our bodies are adept at stench creation, a harsh reality that most of us can fortunately keep under control with showers and deodorant. Nevertheless, there are a number of unlucky people who — despite showering often and investing in powerful deodorants — are steadily trailed by a...
Everyone suffers from dryness now and again. But the occasional cracked elbow is but a scratch compared to the perpetual parchedness — and inescapable, unbearable itchiness — endured by those with chronic skin conditions, like eczema. 29 year old Samantha (an alias to protect her privacy) has...
Women have historically gotten the short end of the fertility stick. It’s not just that we’ve mostly assumed that they’re to blame for any and all pregnancy roadblocks — even though men are responsible for a third of cases and another third is some combination of factors...
If you’re the sort of person who defines their life based on making the correct ordering decision at a restaurant, you’re not alone. I agree with you — few things are worse than spending your hard-earned cash on a mediocre restaurant experience, which is why when I’m...
Like many millennials, Curtis got his first mobile phone when he entered his freshman year of high school. He was 15 years old, and his first phone went with him everywhere. Still, conscious of school rules and eager not to look antisocial, he’d wait to take the...
“Shut up.” “Please shut up.” “Shut your giant flapping mouth-hole before I blow my brains out all over this restaurant you waste of time and oxygen!” These, of course, are the things you want to say when you’re locked in a seemingly endless conversation with that annoying neighbor, that...
If you pee in the pool, it’ll go blue! There’s a special dye in there, designed to detect urine, and it’ll billow around you in a big, embarrassing, pee cloud, and everyone will know you’ve done it, and you’ll be hounded out of town as a known...
The world is a cruel and unpredictable place, and while some dudes are lacking in the hair department, other people have more than they could ever need or want. Among the latter group are a subset of people who feel both ashamed of and burdened by the...
We often assume that plastic surgery is a big deal, and sure, some procedures — liposuction, male breast reduction, etc. — involve intrusive operations and lengthy recovery times that require living as one gigantic bandage for weeks on end. But there are several minimally invasive plastic surgeries...
There are few moments when a man feels more like a man than when he removes a tight lid from a jar. There’s something fundamentally satisfying about that little “pop” sound, which lets us know that we’ve won — we’ve conquered that villainous jar and our heroic, manly strength...
A couple weeks ago, I visited my dentist for a routine cleaning, and he recommended I replace my original silver-colored amalgam fillings with more contemporary tooth-colored ones. I admit, I was almost persuaded (but eventually decided that spending a few hundred bucks so people would stop noticing...