You didn’t really have to go to the bathroom — that was just an excuse. In reality, you just couldn’t take any more of your family: the nagging from the kids, the stomach-tightening political arguments, the same old stupid stories, and everything else that makes you want...
For some reason, our society values socializing with people who purportedly love us, especially at the holidays. But sometimes the people we love — or moreover, the people they love — can be the absolute worst. And sometimes, the best way to deal with such people (in-laws;...
You’re heading to the happy hour before the yearly office holiday party straight from work, and you realize you missed your window to eat anything substantial for dinner. Inevitably — be it from hitting the booze too hard on an empty stomach, or eating 30 bacon-wrapped dates...
So you made the mistake of promising yourself that you’d at least attempt to eat healthy this Thanksgiving, and now there are several mountains of stuffing and a trough of turkey gravy situated directly in front of you. Your grandmother says, “Go ahead and dig in! You...
Men aren’t strangers to “moisturizing” their privates, even though, admittedly, silky-smooth skin isn’t normally the first thing on our minds when we reach for that lotion. But should we be moisturizing down there to keep our skin healthy? According to dermatologist Lisa Chipps, the answer is a...
There has never been so much meat available as there is today. We’re so far beyond our local hunting ground days that not only can you buy your familiar beef and pork at the supermarket, you can even bid on exotic meats like Spanish octopus or green iguana on Facebook. One day all...
Who doesn’t love it when you’re at the beach and a big wave sends a gallon of saltwater up your nose? Don’t you just want to replicate that experience at home? Maybe even pay money to do so? Well, you can! And actually, maybe you should. Despite...
I had all four of my wisdom teeth plucked from mouth back when I was in high school — not because I was in pain, but simply because my dentist at the time told me to. Had I waited much longer to have them removed, he explained,...
I once professed my undying love for downing liquor and then eating enough Chinese takeout to feed the Pentagon. But a man can only handle so much, and I had to make some serious lifestyle changes. So I stopped ordering crab rangoons — a huge loss, I know. Despite...
For 49 and a half years, Doug never rose above walking speed unless he was late for a flight. The Northern Virginia resident had always been pretty skinny, he says — happy enough with his figure to avoid paying attention to his eating habits. And then, with his...
We might have labeled meat-eaters as artery-clogged heathens, constantly mere seconds away from a heart attack, but according to one recent study, they might have one thing going for them: Compared to vegetarians, omnivores could be less likely to have a stroke. Although it goes against all our better judgment about...
Being an adult is the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. I had a whole bunch of awesome hobbies when I was a teenager — playing sports, making music, jumping on trampolines and whatnot — but I had to abandon them all, just so I could make enough...