On a recent trip to the doctor’s office, I was brutally reminded of where I stand in my girlfriend’s life. The moment — which hit me like a middle-of-the-night spider bite that you don’t feel until the morning — occurred when the doctor’s secretary asked her who...
According to the many, many pseudo self-care experts out there, being nice to yourself means spending $125,000 on the 18k gold dumbbells they’re shilling, purchasing Psychic Vampire Repellent or maybe putting yourself through the very specific, flatulent hell of a coffee enema. But according to most psychological experts,...
For the past week, I’ve kept a comb in my front left pocket, and I’m here to report that it will remain there long after this article disappears into the black void of online content. The poetry of the pocket comb begins with the way it neatly...
You may have heard about a recent study from the University of Washington on the science behind motivation, in which researchers concluded that a group of cells known as nociceptin neurons are responsible for all the times you stared deeply at the directions for putting together your newly...
If you’re the sort of person who defines their life based on making the correct ordering decision at a restaurant, you’re not alone. I agree with you — few things are worse than spending your hard-earned cash on a mediocre restaurant experience, which is why when I’m...
The psychological terror of a hangover at 32,000 feet is a singular form of torture. It’s bad enough that you’re literally trapped aboard a flying object weighing 175,000 pounds, with nowhere to go but a small bathroom that forces you to see your disgusting, sweaty face in...
Most mostly-happy couples can agree that 99 percent of all arguments, frustrations and relationship hardships revolve around where and what you’re going to eat. According to a report in the New York Post, the average American couple spends 132 hours a year deciding what to eat, and “a...
Of all the things you might consider in the aftermath of a breakup, I posit that it’s unlikely you stopped to consider that, had you and your significant other had an extra few hundred square feet of space in the apartment you shared, maybe you’d still be...
In the U.S., on average, 20 people die every day waiting for an organ transplant. On the face of it, this makes no sense: According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), there were 2,813,503 registered deaths in the country in 2017: That’s nearly 8,000 per day....
All scars tell a story. Some of these stories are extraordinary, while others are of the “I fell out of my chair and busted open my chin on the table” variety, but each ends with our skin modified, our injured bodies forever altered. While most underlying scar...
So your significant other, who you live with, is sick. She or he is coughing, sneezing and getting their sickly juices on everything from the couch you sit on together to the door knob you use to go to the bathroom, not to mention the toilet seat....
I recently stopped at a motel along Route 66, where I encountered a pearly-white creature crawling on the pillow that would send an itch through my entire body. Of course, I assumed the worst: That it was a bed bug and that my skin, even though I...