For 99.9 percent of the human population, that finely dressed mannequin in the window display might as well have the measurements of an entirely different species. Most of us, even at our best physical selves, don’t measure up to the androgynous 6-foot tall plaster figurine with a...
Unfortunately, human beings aren’t vinyl collections, which means they’re not only far more difficult to dust, you also can’t exactly divvy them up the way you would your Beatles albums. Which is why, when you break up with a person, one of the more complicated questions can...
In an ever more health-conscious society, ironically inhabited by mostly not-very-fit folks, the nutritional focus is in a constant see-saw. One minute the Mediterranean diet is considered healthy; the next, scientists aren’t so sure. Or one week coffee is considered vital to your longevity; the next, you...
Cut and color your hair however you want; wear what you want to wear; get eyelash extensions, or don’t; eat what you want to eat: These are my general responses when having a conversation with my significant other about her body. Obviously, some of these typical couple...
For some folks it’s prune juice, for some it’s the vigorous introduction of a suppository — for others, it’s cigarettes and/or coffee that finally motivates their bowels across the fecal finish line. “You know what I miss about smoking?” writes one redditor. “Having my morning coffee and...
There’s nothing more awkward than speaking to someone who can’t look you in the eye, and there’s nothing creepier than someone who seemingly can’t stop. Solving the problem of finding the perfect amount of eye contact is complicated by the fact that it really depends on the...
In theory, wearing two of something should equate to double the protection — two pairs of socks, for example, should keep your feet warmer in the middle of winter than one pair. (It’s common knowledge that the key to staying warm is layering, right?) But is that...
The quick answer to whether you can wear your hat indoors is almost certainly: Sure, why not? Do you, bruh. But let’s probe this question with a less laissez-faire approach. What does society writ large have to say about the uncouthness of the indoor hat-wearer? First, it...
If we’re going to call a spade a spade, then the first line of the preamble should be edited to say: “We, the mostly obese people of United States…” Because let’s face it, we’re fat. Amongst industrialized countries, America is the fattest of them all, with two...
If we’re to believe the digitally enhanced men of today’s silver screen, male body hair is in decline. Just compare male movie star chest hair from the 1960s to the what we see today. Doesn’t it seem like men — and specifically millennial men — are getting...
There are few instances that provoke riot-type behavior from me — a generally level-headed guy — more than a bartender measuring the amount of alcohol they’re about to pour into my glass as though it’s the chemical catalyst for an atomic bomb. Yes, it’s their job not...
Quick: What’s the best way to trim your body hair without having to clear up a wild scattering of stray pubic tufts? Are you Team Over-the-Toilet? Team Sitting-on-the-Toilet? Team On-the-Bath-Mat? Team In-the-Shower? Team Write-Lengthy-Facebook-Posts-About-“Why-Real-Men-Don’t-Manscape?” For such a silly topic, people sure have a lot of strong opinions...