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  1. Home
  2. Brian VanHooker

Brian VanHooker

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Health

Where Does all the Weight Go When I Lose It?

The mirror suggests it; the scales confirm it: You have, through hardcore dedication and/or a terrible stomach virus, managed to lose some weight. But… lose it where? Where does the fat actually go? Do we digest it? Poop it out? Is it sacrificed to appease the appetites...

Brian VanHooker May 9, 2019
Protein
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Health

You’re Eating Way Too Much Protein

Protein is now everywhere — from shakes and powders to granola bars. Meat, too, is part of our cultural DNA, whether it’s giant steaks or burgers that have quadrupled in size since the 1950s. Obviously you can’t live without protein — it’s the basic building block of...

Brian VanHooker May 8, 2019
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Health

Everything You Probably Don’t Need to Know About Space Herpes, but Whatever, Let’s Talk About Space Herpes

Not only is it harder to get hard in space, we recently got some more bad news about off-Earth travel: It might give you herpes. That’s right: According to a study recently released by NASA, a variety of latent herpes viruses have been reactivating in more than half...

Brian VanHooker April 24, 2019
water_weight
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Health

A Practical Guide to Water Weight

When you’re losing weight, some jerk will always tell you, “Oh, you didn’t really lose five pounds, that’s just water weight.” On the flip side, when you’re packing on the pounds, you’ll tell yourself that you’re, “Pretty sure it’s all water weight.” I submit it to you that,...

Brian VanHooker April 10, 2019
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Health

Are Cold Showers Really Passion-Killers?

When asked how he prepares to play Wolverine, Hugh Jackman revealed a trick he uses to get into the mindset of the rage-filled X-Man: “I take very ice cold showers in the morning, because it really pisses me off,” he told the Los Angeles Times. Which makes...

Brian VanHooker March 25, 2019
murphy_bed
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Features

A Conveniently Compact History of the Murphy Bed

It was the summer of 2007, and I was checking out apartments for my upcoming senior year of college. After being shown a handful of locations by a student rental service, I arrived at a decent-sized apartment that my realtor went on to describe thusly as we...

Brian VanHooker March 22, 2019
Ear_Wax
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Health

Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Earwax (But We’re Going to Tell You Anyway)

Earwax comes in many guises, varying in color from amber to brown to gray to black, its consistency ranging from wet and gooey to dry and flakey. But whatever its form, it’s universally considered gross and unwelcome by the general public, which is unfortunate, because this nasty-seeming...

Brian VanHooker March 20, 2019
sick_hair_days
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Health

Why Do I Have Bad Hair Days When I’m Sick?

Maybe it’s just me, but it seems like every time I’m sick, my hair gets sick too. When I wore my hair shorter, it wouldn’t cooperate at all when a flu, cold, etc. knocked me on my butt —  it’d just twist and curl and be a...

Brian VanHooker March 14, 2019
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Style

Why Can’t We Just Sleep in Our Clothes?

“What, did you sleep in your clothes again last night?” Marty McFly’s older brother asks him when Marty wakes in the new-and-improved 1985 at the end of Back to the Future. It’s clear from his brother’s inflection that this isn’t an acceptable behavior, but conventional wisdom — and scorn from...

Brian VanHooker March 11, 2019
clock
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Features

Why Your Brain Hates You When You Wake Up in the Middle of the Night

The bad thing you said to a close relative who passed soon after. The career-altering mistake you made. The one that got away — or rather, left because you messed up. Why are these the thoughts that bounce off the inside of your skull when you wake up at...

Brian VanHooker February 21, 2019
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Why Do Hotels Make You Horny?

It’s a universal truth: No matter what time of day it is or how jet-lagged you are from your flight, as soon as you enter that hotel room with your significant other, all you want to do is bang. Unpacking can wait as you momentarily forget how gross those sheets...

Brian VanHooker February 15, 2019
Hard_Nips
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Does Anyone Care When You’re a Guy with Hard Nipples?

“Men’s nipples can be carnal command centers.” This is the phrase that sticks most in my head after a week of looking deep into the mystery of men’s hard nipples. The sentence appeared in a 2014 Cosmopolitan piece about male nipple sensitivity, and I’m not sure if it’s just...

Brian VanHooker February 13, 2019
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