We’re in the midst of summer, which means when you’re not getting sandy in the scorching hot sun, you’re probably going to the movies to see some summer flicks, like the one with the dude in the spider costume or the other with that freaky clown. Whatever...
You’ve probably seen the story shared on social media, or on one of those Fwd: Fwd: Fwd: Fwd: emails from your mom: As a lark, a dude finds his ex-girlfriend’s pregnancy test in his bathroom and, naturally, he pees on it, as men are wont to do....
I had quite a talent for collecting scars when I was a kid — I cracked my forehead open twice, once on my metal bed frame and again on a slippery pool deck. I sliced my hand open once, too: I was rolling down the sidewalk on...
I recently stopped at a motel along Route 66, where I encountered a pearly-white creature crawling on the pillow that would send an itch through my entire body. Of course, I assumed the worst: That it was a bed bug and that my skin, even though I...
I often observe, bemused, as my girlfriend fiddles with her eyelashes before presenting herself to the general public. She chomps on them with a strange metal clamp thingy, darkens them with some black sludge and combs them with a miniature round brush that looks like it was...
A while back, I reported that frozen fruits and vegetables are perhaps even healthier than the fresh kind, and my freezer has since become a mecca for broccoli, spinach and tropical fruit blends. I now plan on constructing the ultimate freezer, where an assortment of healthy foods can escape...
The past week was glorious. You tried every possible combination at the hotel omelette bar, became a treasured regular at the swim-up pool bar and even learned how to make an epic Sex on the Beach from some dude at the beach who said he was a mixologist, but may...
We know that long afternoons at the beach make you sleepy — this is in large part due to the sun suppressing your melatonin production, which helps control your daily wake-sleep cycle (also, those eight room-temperature beers you pounded might have something to do with it). It often, too,...
Famed French poet Anatole France once said, “To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.” Well, Anatole, this summer, I believe I can drink enough blended booze to forget who I am while also not putting on 20 pounds....
According to a recent study reported in Newsweek, Americans are traveling abroad more than ever before, and spent about $135 billion on overseas tourism in 2017. With more international travel, though, comes the inevitable — jet lag, or to give it its fancy medical name, desynchronosis. If you’ve had...
In a world where every fact is someone else’s #FakeNews, no topic is safe. For example: Stretching. Numerous stories on the internet say stretching before exercise is bad for you because it can make working out less effective — or even increase your risk of injury. But...
You were nine vodkas deep when brunch plans were being made. In the hours that have since passed, you (somehow) spent $68 on fast food, puked in the kitchen sink and woke up feeling like a pizza pocket that was microwaved for six consecutive hours (which is ironic,...